Actually the only things I can think of are a cockmeatsandwich and a cheetah on weed. None of which are things we need to fear during our stay at the IRC which is pleasant enough in general until of course...
You share a cell with a minister dude who said sneezed on someone's sandwich and got hauled in for sodomy or you have to eat with Hart-binder Singh who isn't an inmate but rather a form of torture or you have to listen to the other inmates be affected and moan about having a shitty government who doesn't believe in truth and covers up their shortcomings and lies and bullshit.
At least the entertainment there is good. Which is doing nothing at all. Still, we had to escape. We had to bring truth to the people...
We escaped on a motorbike which none of us could ride. We had to lean to a side to take turns and the IRC people chased after us on their kapchais. Chellius doesn't believe in weed so out motorbike couldn't run high like the cheetah (if it was a cheetah) it ran low until it sputtered and died and we got off and ran like squawking chickens flapping their wings.
The reasonable man met us and handed us our disguises - a pottu for Chellius and an eyebrow waxing kit for me so people wouldn't notice my moustache is above my eyes instead of above my lip. He turned to leave but before he did so he said, "But for your reasonably good nonsense, you would not have kena tangkaped by the IRC, so be reasonable for once."
I turned to Chellius, "You know what, the reasonable man is so not my hero anymore. I am my hero. We fucken escaped from Hart-binder yo. Damn, we cool."
Chellius replied, "Unicorn power!"
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