Dear Miss JK Rowling

Hi there miss jk rowling, my government name is michelle and my government age is 21 and somehow i am indian person. after 256 years of bearing the brunt of your messed up english education system and facing the horrible advent of twilight i have decided to write to you a letter about how your stories made me happy while i sat for my PMR and SPM (OWLS and NEWTs equivalent see) and i took em together with harry potter when he sat for his ok. (i know that harry did not sit for his final year but then if i had to battle the dark wizard i would totally not do it myself by the way)

well, my real name is unicorn chelle chelle and i am actually a precocious 8 year old who has an amazing grasp on constructing sentences with the newly learnt words but the inability to spell as well as the kids who are 6 years old.

the reason why i tell you all these seemingly irrelevant facts about my dual personalities is because i assure you many adults out there who are apparently 25 years old are actually merely 10 years old in the head, possibly not even mature 10 year olds. they love your books miss rowling and although yes, im incredibly happy you wrote beedle the bardwhatever (ok i didn't read it yet but that's not the point). the point is that you have stopped writing about harry and his friends. or an actual franchise-worthy story.

why would it bother me though. i mean after all the time of pleading sanctuary within the confines of some communistic plot, why should i ask you to bring forth some silly franchise plan? is because, if you dont soon, STEPHANIE MYER WILL OK.

if you say, retire now like all white uk people do (eg: tony blair, mister bean etc), you will just be labeled as this old kook with loads of money who should be thrown into the funny bin. thats' ok cause i hear the funny bin has lots of nice peoples you can play rock paper scissors with! but then there will be this enemy of the literary world that sleeps not, rests not and thinks not (evident from her writing ok) and she will create this entire new universe and make the young people forget you EVER EXISTED MISS ROWLING.

there will be this sudden new book named after some my little pony creature, like minty magic (see its alliteration somemore) where there is this girl that has no abilities whatsoever but befriends a man with magical powers and all he wants to do is protect her from those potentially devastating powers of his. and then suddenly there is this dark lord that says that he has her father and he actually doesn't and she has to save her father and then her boyfriend saves her.

accuse me for weak plot-structure but i tell you someone already did it and is A MILLIONAIRE OK. ya miss rowling, she will overthrow you and although you spent your entire life crafting something as mystical and magical as harry potter, YOU WILL BE FORGOTTEN BY THE LITTLE PEOPLE OF TODAY.

so please lah, write some special story about harry's children. i mean come on, logically i dont think that there isn't even a little bit of antagonism in the wizarding world. please? please? michael jackson already died as a child molester to the little people of today. so can you please not die as some stephanie myer cop out because i really dun like her.

i heart you miss jk rowling.

love,
unicorn chelle chelle chellious (narcissism makes you say your name three times for the cult effect)